cheesy

I did my patriotic thing at the Miller Outdoor Theater (along with half of Houston and all their collective children) with what was described as the Houston Symphony Orchestra. We couldn't see anything from our side of the hill, so I'll have to trust that it was.

I was wrong about The Yellow Rose of Texas. The handclaps come during Deep in the Heart of Texas, a strange ritual that always reminded me of a Catholic Mass or the "Ohhh!" at Camden Yards during the Star Spangled Banner--if you weren't raised Catholic, or a Baltimoron, you feel like you're the only one in the room with no idea what's going on.

The "Armed Services Medley" reminded me of Farenheit 9/11 (the other patriotic thing I did this weekend). That Michael Moore's a real jerk (ok--the woman is grieving, we understand, do not force us to watch for 10 minutes in order to elicit tears from the audience; the facts are strong enough on their own) but thank god for him. If I had bought popcorn, I would have thrown it at GWB's face on the screen many times throughout the movie. Since I had nothing to throw, I just seethed in my seat, joyfully envisioning my Texas ballot in the fall. The rest of the movie-goers, I imagine, were having similar fantasies, and cries of "he's a monster!" and spontaneous applause riddled the quiet theater. In HOUSTON this happened! No joke!

What I have left to say has no connection to any of this. I bought Wilson Philips's new CD for their goosebump-inducing cover of "Go Your Own Way." The rest of the album is, yes, a little cheesy, but not as cheesy as this exchange over grape juice:

M: This tastes horrible. How could juice have gone so wrong?
J: Because you keep buying weird juices. What was that one there--white cranberry or something? Why don't you just buy nice, normal orange juice?
M: This is normal--it's supposed to be white grape.
J: No. Grape juice should be purple.
M: That's just... you're-- you're GRAPCIST!