keeping up appearances

I think I look a little crazy lately, showing up places in modified value village clothing mixed with things from the back of the closet and the everpresent red shoes.

This cardigan, for example, was a dowdy White Stag (aka Walmart brand) model that I figured could pass for schoolmarm come September, when the classrooms get icy, until I decided to move the button and throw it all assymetrical. Likewise the off-white skirt dyed deep wine, the baby-doll dress turned skirt, and the ill-fitting too-long tank-dress turned halter-top, with contrast stiching. Let there be no mistake: I know nothing about sewing aside from a travel kit my mother sent off with me, and less about fashion. When asked about "the rules" Lana says: "darling, we break all the rules," and so I bravely attack with scissors. (If it cost $2 to start with, what's there to lose?)

All this to disguise the fact that, since May, I've put on a little weight that I'm hoping will unloose itself once the stress of teaching sets in again.

Until then, I approach my closet like a hunter. T-shirts cower; A-line skirts try to appear invisible. "We'll change!" they protest. "We'll flatter your curves in all the right places! Just don't turn us into throw pillows!"