Whole Foods? Wholly Useless.

The scene: Mary, bewildered in a sea of homeopathic remedies.
Whole Foods Employee: "Can I help you find something?"
M: "I'm looking for the equivalent to ibuprofen."
WFE: "Umm... we don't really sell anything like that."
M: "How about a general pain med?"
WFE: "...no."
M: "Cramps?"
WFE: "Well... we sell flax seed oil."
M: "Nevermind."